Can a ChemSex fuck ever be a sober buddy?
Some of you might remember Marco from Do You Know. He seems to keep popping up here and there and we had this conversation. This is what happens when you start to talk about sex and drugs and insecurities and even your HIV meds. You find support and love and a little too much sass at times! Say hello to Marco AGAIN!
Greg Owen: When do you get back from Italy?
Marco: I’m back, I landed an hour ago!
Greg Owen: How was your trip? And your family?
Marco: It was great thanks. And the family are all well and happy
Greg Owen: Yesterday I was in a room full of European and International sexual health experts – lol. Was very surreal to be addressing a room like that. Oh and with art imitating life….You pop up AGAIN ffs
“Many people navigate the ChemSex environment very well and enjoy it. They have good and pleasant experiences. But many don’t. I personally enjoyed my time on that scene. There were dark and destructive times but there were great times too. In fact, some of the people I met at chill outs and connected with while high and naked have subsequently popped up in my life recently in unexpected situations – sober and clothed! I have really enjoyed reconnecting with theses guys again. One person that springs to mind is Marco from my Do You Know piece.”
Greg Owen: Marco you are like Groundhog fucking gay….
Marco: Hahaha. Is that what you said in that room full of Health care people?
Greg Owen: No! Not in the room dumbass, they don’t need to know about my ChemSex past life in that kinda detail! It’s from my blog ‘ChemSex & Me’
Marco: Yeah I meant there , I thought you said that at the event yesterday!
Greg Owen: Jesus Christ – gimme some credit
Marco: That’s asking a lot
Greg Owen: “I’m worth it”
Marco: Haha. Flick that hair…Oh wait you can’t
Greg Owen: You did not just make a thinning hair joke! Mofo
Marco: Hair loss is no joke – For those without
Greg Owen: If I get too low on hair I could make a weave or 5 out of your body hair….You got plenty to spare
Marco: Please…mine is fitting. And looks good
Greg Owen: ‘Fitting’??? Yes, perhaps – like a fitted carpet! I found your Grindr pics…lol
Marco: Haha at least I look like a man and not the Major of the Munchkin City
Greg Owen: Man beast! Bitch please – you made no complaints! #justsayin lol
Marco: Minimal impact
Greg Owen: hahaha! Well in hindsight I think we can agree that that may not have been the case lol and you can’t backtrack now. That moment played out – you can’t try changing the facts…Leprechaun lover!
Marco: Haha as long as you admit you’re a leprechaun
Greg Owen: haha. Thats Irish luck for you
Marco: Hehe you have a loose definition of luck
Greg Owen: You have a loose definition of ass and morals but hey ho or hey hoe
Marco: That’s why you met that criteria
Greg Owen: hahahhahaha – oh god…We are never going to graduate to ‘kind and sweet friends’ are we???? This is the dynamic
Marco: It’s established
Greg Owen: Indeed- and cemented. You are quite relentless. I would have worn most others down by now
Marco: Hehehe that made me laugh
Greg Owen: Good! It was half a joke and half serious lol But I like a challenge….I WILL break you eventually
Marco: Many have tried, all have failed
Greg Owen: Many and all ARE NOT ME…
Marco: You’re hardly the upper quartile. I’ve met many a great mind
Greg Owen: Its not my mind you need concern yourself with – my tongue is steely
Marco: I guess there are other bits you need to compensate for
Greg Owen: haha. Not in the slightest. I’m happy with my lot and my skills exceed any physical confines….
Marco: You’re not the first bitchy munchkin I’ve come across.
Greg Owen: I don’t believe you came across nor in me….I recall….very well. You skulked home – tired. Lightweight
Marco: You’d have been the 8th dwarf if you weren’t jealous of Snow White
Greg: Hahahahaha. That’s hilarious
Greg Owen: Thank you for that – I actually laughed out loud
Ok – I need to get out of bed and do something productive today
Marco: Oh dear. It’s noon. That’s a good idea
Greg Owen: I changed my meds on Wed (last week) have had a little bit of a bumpy ride. But nothing serious
Marco: Aww. Physical or mental? Actually mental may be hard to tell
Greg Owen: Physical but because I’ve not been ill or had any side effects previously it affected me a little bit emotionally last night. Mainly just because I’m tired. It was nausea at first but that went after about 3-4 days. But then the tiredness!!!!!! Bouts of fatigue are horrible and so out of the norm for me. But I feel ok today for the moment anyway
Marco: How long is it expected to last?
Greg Owen: It can last up to a month but I progressed through the nausea in a matter of days not weeks so I’m hoping it will be the same with the fatigue. A lot of guys I have spoke to who are also on Triumeq said about 2 weeks then they were back to normal….so I got a week left.
Marco: Hopefully. Try taking B100. Plus vitamin D tablets
Greg Owen: Thanks. Someone else said that too. How come you went home to visit the family anyway?
Marco: It was my nephew’s christening and my best friend who lives in Australia was there this week too so I wanted to catch up with him
Greg Owen: Wicked – so you had a buddy and it wasn’t all family
Marco: Yeah – I haven’t seen my best friend in 2 years so it was so good to go out and party and go a bit crazy with him
Greg Owen: That’s sweet. And how is work?
Marco: Going really well. I got promoted to group project manager and loads of exciting stuff coming up
Greg Owen: Good – Im pleased for you
Marco: Thank you. Great holiday though. Went out a bit too much I think but really fun
Greg Owen: It’s really important to do that. I’ve been making friends with my sex life again….at last lol
Marco: Hehe how so?
Greg Owen: I just felt a bit better in my skin now since I got my ass back in the gym and time to trust the science – undetectable ‘n all
lol. Nah…seriously I just thought it was about time. Had some lovely experiences and sober sex. And the guys were too hot to pass by
Marco: Haha that’s good
Greg Owen: It was good
Marco: Were you only have sex on drugs before now?
Greg Owen: Yes, only chemsex from 2013 til this Oct and since Oct only sober and 1 on 1. I prefer it
Marco: Wow that’s great. Well done
Greg Owen: It wasn’t totally intentional
Marco: How hard did you find the transition?
Greg Owen: I have too much anxiety to be on Grindr with this level of visibility. Not hard at all really
Marco: The old fashioned way is better
Greg Owen: It’s a re-learning of previous pleasures for sure but purer pleasures and I’d like a relationship again at some point. Sober sex has to be a part of that. So I guess it was sex in training for a boyfriend!
Marco: Haha – like being in training for the sexolympics
Greg Owen: ChemSex-ers Anonymous lol. 12 steps instead of 12 guys at once haha
Greg Owen: It’s an enjoyable programme hehe
Marco: I can imagine 🙂
Greg Owen: Nice to know I got some skills in myself and not just in a Jiffy bag. Slightly daunting at first but worth the plunge
Marco: The sober sex you mean?
Greg Owen: Yes – everyone can fuck like a porn star on chems…
good to know I can bring the filth sober too